A letter to my son...

To my dearest baby boy,

I remember being a teenager, thinking of what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. There were visions of college, houses, marriage, family traditions and trips, and you. Of all of those things, being a mom was the most important thing on my list. I felt that I was meant to be a mother- put on this Earth for one purpose. As I got older, I realized that there would need to be certain things happen before I could meet you. I wanted to provide you with so many things- a safe home, patience, stability, security, love, and an amazing father. Your father and I have made this home for you and filled it with love. We can't wait to share our lives with you and teach you so many things.

I know I haven't met you yet but I feel as though I already know you- you've certainly made an impression already. Carrying you with me for the past months has been one of the most exciting times of my life. Feeling you move, worrying about you, hearing your heartbeat, seeing you at doctor's appointment, preparing your room and even washing your clothes has been such a great time for me. Needless to say, I'm beyond excited to meet you, hold you, care for you, and most importantly love you with everything I have.

I often find myself "spacing out" and daydreaming about what you will look like, what silly things you will do (I'm sure you'll take after your father in the humor category), who you will become, what struggles you will face, what changes you will make in this world, and so many other things. I've never been in a situation in which I know that a person has so much possibility and nothing standing in his or her way. In this case, it's you. You can be and do anything. It's a clean slate and you have all the possibilities and capabilities in the world. Know that I will be there to support you, help you, guide you, discipline you when needed, and love you no matter what your choices. I will be there to catch you if you mess up because it's bound to happen but I will also be there to share in your joys- because those are bound to happen much more frequently.

You have already made such an impact in my life. Thank you for the opportunity to be your mother. I'm sure I won't be perfect by any means. There will be times in which I will say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, and make you very angry; but know that I love you more than words could ever express. I may not be perfect but I will always strive to be the best mother that I can possibly be- to provide you with good examples and teach you right from wrong. I feel very blessed to be your mother and I want you to know that you are truly a gift to me and our family.

I love you with all my heart and I know that you will forever change my life in ways that you cannot imagine. Know that I will do anything for you...Hope to see you soon.

With more love than you can imagine,
Your mother

Fall is my favorite...

Each year, I constantly (and patiently) wait for Autumn to come. I am amazed each year how much I look forward to fall and how much I love this season. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy all the seasons but I specifically enjoy Autumn for so many reasons. Between the leaves changing colors, to the chilly weather where you have to wear a sweater, to the fun things there are to do at this time of year, I LOVE this season.

I know it's not everyone's favorite. I understand that some people look at Autumn as the season where everything is dying and it can be dreary but let me share with you just some of my favorite Fall time things. Maybe you'll find something fun for Fall. Also, if you have any favorites that I missed, please let me know! I'd love to soak up as much of this season as I possibly can!

1. Back to School season- I know that school technically starts in the August/September time range but back to school means new wardrobe, new school supplies, Fall sports, and all the excitement of starting with a clean slate.

2. All the pretty colors- There is something that just makes me happy about orange, red, yellow, purple, and black. I love to see those colors together and frankly the Fall leaves are amazing in our area. Just seeing all the leaves changing is beautiful to me.

3. Chilly weather- I LOVE wearing sweaters and having to "bundle" up just a little to go outside. Don't get me wrong, I don't like wearing a ton of layers but I enjoy having to wear scarves and maybe a pair of gloves with a cute sweater. It's also the best sleeping weather. Turn off the AC and open the windows. It makes for those mornings when you just don't want to get out of bed because it's so nice and warm where you are. LOVE it!

4. Fun Fall activities- I remember in high school having barn parties and hay mazes...those fond memories haven't been forgotten and I miss those times. Now that I'm older, I still enjoy corn mazes, pumpkin patches, and haunted houses that come with the Fall season. I love that people go with their families (in their sweaters) to pick out pumpkins, walk through the mazes, or have the every loving crap scared out of them. I don't know of any other season that has so many fun activities.

Noah and Mac carving away

5. All the fantastic smells- Yes I know...it may be crazy but I LOVE the Fall smells. Some of my favorites are pumpkin pie, apple cake (I'll include a fantastic recipe later), apple cider, Bath and Body Works Pumpkin Caramel Latte soap (trust me- it's awesome), all the cinnamon that people seem to use in decorations and food, and Yankee Candle Autumn Leaves and Mountain Lodge. These are the best smells and just make me relax. I know it may be crazy but some of these smells just make my day better.

6. Halloween and Thanksgiving- These two holidays are by far my favorites. I always love to pass out candy to the adorable kids in my development, dress Mac Dawg up as whatever he is willing to wear that night, and eat the candy that I tend to stash for myself. :-) I don't usually dress up because I know I'm not going anywhere but I'm very excited in the upcoming years to dress my family up in some crazy outfit and walk around the neighborhood saying "Trick or Treat"! Thanksgiving is also a favorite holiday. I enjoy having people over and making the food that will make everyone pass out afterwards, not to mention all of the football games. Ya gotta love those boys of fall...

Noah's Painting Skills

7. New nail tricks- I know this one may not apply to everyone but I have a new favorite and it's going very well this Fall. (In fact, for this pic, I have my hubby to thank) I have completely fallen for OPI Shatter Nail Polish. My wonderful mother bought me the blue and black shatter colors, so in true Halloween fashion, I painted my nails orange and black. (Well Noah painted for me) I couldn't help but remark that my toes looked like witch's toes- not that I've ever seen witch's toes but it's what I imagine witch's toes would look like. I just love the fact that my toes are so festive.

All in all, I just love Fall. I have actually tried to figure out where in the world we could move to have Fall all year round...turns out- nowhere. :-(  I suppose that's ok for me. Fall is a season that I truly enjoy and I'll try to soak up every minute I possibly can while it's here.


ps. Here is the easiest Apple Cake recipe ever! Enjoy!

Mix 1 cup oil, 2 cups sugar, 2 eggs- Beat until creamy.
Add: 1 tsp. cinnamon, 2 1/2 cups flour, 2 tsp. baking powder, 1 tsp. baking soda, and 1 tsp. salt.
Mix well. Fold in 3 cups chopped apples and 1 cup nuts (optional). Place mixture in your baking dish and put 1- 12 oz. bag of chocolate chips on top. Bake at 350 for 50-60 minutes. Cool and enjoy!

Happy Fall everyone!

Trash the Dress Shots- 2009 

That's your choice to make...

*Warning: This post is a bit of a vent so bare with me.

After being pregnant for 37 weeks, I can honestly say that I'm thrilled with my choice to become a parent. Yes, I know that my life will never be the same. Trust me...no really, I get it. I am well aware that my sleeping patterns, finances, social life, marriage, and many other things will forever be changed due to my personal choice to conceive, be pregnant, and keep this child. I have already made sacrifices that some may not understand. No, I haven't had an alcoholic drink since January 1st. No, I don't dye my hair anymore due to the chemicals. No, I don't eat raw sushi. No, I can't spend the money on a lavish vacation or outrageous clothes. No, I can't stay up super late anymore. No, I don't feel comfortable going to a dance club or bar with this giant belly. No, I don't currently have an office of my own because it has become a baby nursery. No, I can't fit any of my clothes that I used to be able to wear. No, my body will never look the way it did before. And most importantly, NO I DON'T REGRET MY DECISION!

Excuse my passion but I want to make something clear. To become a parent is a very special and personal choice. Just like NOT wanting to be a parent is a special and personal choice. I understand that people may not comprehend my choice but I do wish people would respect it. Just like I respect their choice to NOT become a parent. I can, at times, be judgmental but this is one opinion that I can honestly say I have NEVER judged anyone on. I truly feel that it is not my place to tell people whether or not they should or should not have children. I have never tried to convince anyone that doesn't want children that they should nor will I ever do that. To become or not become a parent is your choice and I will forever respect that- if you change your mind or not.

The only thing I ask is to keep your snide remarks to yourself about being pregnant or becoming a parent. I am having a great time being pregnant and preparing for our new addition. We are thrilled to become parents. That being said, I don't appreciate hearing how you think pregnancy is weird and gross; or that children are boring, naggy little brats; or that you would never have children because you truly enjoy life; or that my life will suddenly no longer be enriched because of a study that was recently done. I'm excited to have "pointless and random" conversations with my son about whatever goes through his imaginative brain. I'm excited to watch him grow and learn new things. I'm thrilled to know that I am carrying the love that Noah and I share and that soon he will be here to give us his love too. So despite your passionate feelings about children, can you at least keep your nay-saying to yourself...you're killing my buzz.